I have a very good friend who once confessed to me that he only poops at work. He told me that it is the American dream to get paid to take a dump. Lots of people are losing their jobs, he said, and he intended on taking advantage of one of the few remaining perks in life – sitting on the toilet at his office. [via lemondrop]
He said, "Why poop at home if someone is paying you to work? Might as well poop on the clock."
I thought this was crazy, until I started to hate my job in Human Resources and took this concept on a test run.
My #2 Work Goal
I only pooped at work, which required mad skills on my part because I traveled more than 50 percent of the time. I am an advocate of pooping when nature calls -- and I take Benefiber to keep my plumbing in good shape -- but I started holding my urge to poop until I was officially on the company's time.
Click here to read how Laurie's experiment went -- and why you should try it.
When I was in my office, I coordinated my personal 'business' with my professional schedule. When I traveled, I waited until I arrived at the local office or off-site meeting to poop.
I will admit that my bowels weren't happy with this experiment; however, this small act of resistance made me feel like the playing field was slightly more level. I couldn't earn more money or make the CEO implement a more thoughtful company strategy, but I could take a crap at work and get five minutes of peace in my day.
Poo Against the Machine
I am making this confession because your company is spending an amazing amount of money with large communications firms who claim that they can improve employee morale in this sagging economic climate.
Instead of pouring money into improved health-care coverage or better day-care benefits, your company is hiring communications gurus who will ask you questions like, "Do you have a best friend at work?"
It is condescending and insulting to be asked questions about how you 'feel' at work. If you are like most Americans, you feel grateful to have a job, but you struggle with economic uncertainty. You wake up in the morning; get your kids off to school; and if you're lucky, you have time to take a crap.
Furthermore, you hate having your day interrupted with stupid employee surveys that never result in any long-term change. Why don't they let you get back to work so you can help make some money for your company?
Fight Back
If you are mad as hell about corporate irresponsibility and want to make yourself feel better, I suggest that you try my poop-at-work process.
Let me know how it works. Do you exclusively poop at work, right now? Do you ever go at work? Leave a comment and let me know if your daily time-out session makes life a little easier
He said, "Why poop at home if someone is paying you to work? Might as well poop on the clock."
I thought this was crazy, until I started to hate my job in Human Resources and took this concept on a test run.
My #2 Work Goal
I only pooped at work, which required mad skills on my part because I traveled more than 50 percent of the time. I am an advocate of pooping when nature calls -- and I take Benefiber to keep my plumbing in good shape -- but I started holding my urge to poop until I was officially on the company's time.
Click here to read how Laurie's experiment went -- and why you should try it.
When I was in my office, I coordinated my personal 'business' with my professional schedule. When I traveled, I waited until I arrived at the local office or off-site meeting to poop.
I will admit that my bowels weren't happy with this experiment; however, this small act of resistance made me feel like the playing field was slightly more level. I couldn't earn more money or make the CEO implement a more thoughtful company strategy, but I could take a crap at work and get five minutes of peace in my day.
Poo Against the Machine
I am making this confession because your company is spending an amazing amount of money with large communications firms who claim that they can improve employee morale in this sagging economic climate.
Instead of pouring money into improved health-care coverage or better day-care benefits, your company is hiring communications gurus who will ask you questions like, "Do you have a best friend at work?"
It is condescending and insulting to be asked questions about how you 'feel' at work. If you are like most Americans, you feel grateful to have a job, but you struggle with economic uncertainty. You wake up in the morning; get your kids off to school; and if you're lucky, you have time to take a crap.
Furthermore, you hate having your day interrupted with stupid employee surveys that never result in any long-term change. Why don't they let you get back to work so you can help make some money for your company?
Fight Back
If you are mad as hell about corporate irresponsibility and want to make yourself feel better, I suggest that you try my poop-at-work process.
Let me know how it works. Do you exclusively poop at work, right now? Do you ever go at work? Leave a comment and let me know if your daily time-out session makes life a little easier
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